two marines: one love

I don't know what's wrong with me lately, but I can't seem to stay happy. It seems like I want to talk to Devil more than he wants to talk to me. I'm the one that has to keep the conversations going, or else he'll just stop talking. He'll text me and say 'Hey babe' and then it'll be an hour before he texts back. He'll tell me we're going to skype later on, and I get all ready and then something always comes up. And when he does actually talk to me for more than a few minutes at a time, it always gets interrupted by something.

I know he's at MOS School. I know I'm not his top priority and I won't ever be as long as he's in the Marine Corps. I just feel like crap because I miss him a lot more than he misses me. He's surrounded by Marines and he actually has something to do, so maybe that's why he doesn't miss me as much. It just hurts my feelings a little bit when I tell him that I miss him and all he has to say back is "I know".

I hate that I'm so attached to him. All I can think about is when the next time I'm going to be able to see him is... I'm not even thinking about myself going through boot camp and it's only about two months away now. I hate it. If he's not missing me, why should I have to spend so much of my time missing him? I even told him 'It's alright though, I don't miss you that much anymore', just to see what he'd say, and he was like "That's good!". How is that good?

As much as I want to stop missing him, I can't. And I hate that he has so much power over me and my feelings. But I think I'm going to try and stop thinking about him so much, or sitting around waiting for him to text me... because now I know he's not thinking about the same thing. This probably sounds crazy, but I don't really know the right words to explain it. I'm just in a really weird mood and I hope it passes soon. I just want to leave for boot camp already. Then I'll have other things to do and think about, besides him.